Here. Not here.

I’ve been in this weird phase for some time now. My mind, unfortunately, may finally be changing into that of an adult’s. Oh the horror! I’ve been doing mostly university work (dissertation, assignments, skill labs et al) and only been a passive observer when  it comes to the virtual sphere.

I’ve recently developed a love-hate (though more like dislike-hate) relationship with Facebook. I’ve deactivated and reactivated my account around 4 times in the past two months. I just don’t find anything useful enough to do on Facebook, but when I’ve deactivated the account, I get all curious as to what might be happening in my absence. It’s like a drug. And I need to get over these withdrawal symptoms. Really. This is one of those instances when you realize why a certain word is used to describe something. Facebook ‘addiction’ makes a lot of sense now, huh?

As for blogging, once again, I’ve been reading a few, skipping a few and not posting anything at all (obviously you know that). Same goes for my craft blog too. Thankfully, I craft just as much as before (maybe even more), but I just don’t post about it.

The reason for this lethargic attitude could be that whenever I switch on the laptop, it reminds me of my unfinished dissertation. This makes me feel guilty and I subsequently do nothing more than mindlessly surf. Yes, I know this is a symptom of trying to flee away from something I don’t wish to do (downside of being a Psychology geek – you tend to analyze all your moods in psychological terms and reach devastating conclusions).

I did however open an Instagram account. Couldn’t resist the filters. And such pretty photographs! Ideal for passive surfing. And then I enthusiastically posted some of my own clicks.

(If you’re a newbie Instagrammer too, then do visit me [Username : sanchari54] and we can hyperventilate about others’ jaw-dropping uploads together. If you’re not a newbie, you could still visit me so that I can gape adoringly at your fabulous work.)

Okay. Must get back to dissertation. Can you see it giving me reproachful looks from my personal folder over there? Ooh look! Butterflies! Golden butterflies!

[I shall return when I’m able to talk sense. Auf wiedersehen!]

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Graduation y’all!

Did I mention that I’m now officially a graduate? No? Well, now you know!

And I might just have secured myself a rank in the university. Thank you God :)

I still don’t feel like a graduate.  I mean it’s supposed to be a great big event in my life, but right now I’m still not getting that OMG-life-epoch feeling. Oh well. Soon enough I guess!

Confusing, Life Is.

While growing up, I was always one of those kids who’s ready with a smile on her face if you were to approach her in a friendly manner.
However, I was never the one who would take the initiative to approach someone myself  and basically take the first step. So, you could say I’m an introvert but only till you get to know me.

Now, what with having to grow up (which really sucks right now, y’know?) and all, I’m expected to talk a lot; far more than I am used to. It’s true that college helped me open up and made me more confident, but I still can’t be the one who can talk endlessly about herself. But during interviews or in conversations with strangers  who know nothing about me, I have to express exactly what I am within a small period of time.

Now, this is really tough. It usually takes me quite some time to open up and actually talk about myself, but now I’m faced with the situation that if I do not open up real quick and tell a complete stranger all about how much I’m suitable for a certain thing, I’m out of the running.

I’ve always been fortunate to get a lot of love and affection from family and friends for being one who could listen. And that could happen only because I could also keep shut and listen for a change. But now I see that it is those who were the talkers who can present themselves better in front of strangers in a short span of time. And I’m still stuck, thinking whether I should just say what’s on my mind without thinking so bloody much.

So, people found me to be a serious student and a dependable friend because I could listen attentively. But now I must prove myself to the world by changing this habit of talking less.

Confusing, life is.